There are so many words that I could use to describe my journey and the different aspects of motherhood: elation, joy, completeness, love, fulfilling, frustrating, tiring, demanding, life-giving, life sapping. But looking back on my journey so far, a phrase I would use to encapsulate all of these words is “a courageous mission”.
Motherhood for me was a re-birthing into a self and a world that I couldn’t have predicted.
It is a world where everything has added significance, an importance beyond the immediate. I feel the weight of my mistakes heavier but the joys lift me higher than ever before. Even my skillset; that that in which I am strong I become stronger and that that in which I am weak becomes blaringly obvious.
The girls go back to school tomorrow, and mentally I am preparing myself for the school gate question, ‘How was your holidays?’
Yesterday I helped my 6-year-old write her first Haiku. We brainstormed a topic, counted syllables, and created a poem. It was wonderful for this poetry-loving mother. I had tears in my eyes, as I thought, “I will write a blog post about this tonight. My daughter wrote a haiku and my heart is full.”