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August 2018

post-natal-depression

When I got married just after I turned 18, I was sure that I was on-track to having the life I’d planned.

You know the one. Just like the TV ad families with a happy marriage, beautiful kids, a nice house and permanently tanned and fit bodies.

And 15 months later, when a bubbly blonde little girl made us a family of three I expected her arrival to be the next step towards our perfect life.

But I knew something wasn’t right when I sat there holding this darling little human, feeling empty and confused.

And when my milk refused to come, that was when I started to believe that I’d ‘failed’ at being a mum. I had started taking notice of what I considered were my failures. I was a harsh critic.

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in Marriage

I Didn’t Marry the One

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marry-the-one

I did not marry the one. 

There, I said it. 
I love my husband, dearly, but when we walked down the aisle, neither of us held onto delusions that we had found someone who would fill the hole in our lives. We didn’t find the one who was going to be our everything or who would understand us perfectly. 
We found something infinitely better. 
When I walked down the aisle and said, “I do,” I married the man who was going to stretch me to my limits, who was going to be used by God to help make me more like Christ, and who was  just as determined as I was to fight through life together.

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teachable

“If you reject discipline, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding” (Proverbs 15:32 NLT).

What does being teachable mean to you? I’ve been contemplating what I believe it to mean and how I reflect this in my life.

I have a procedure I try to implement when it comes to critical feedback. It’s worthy to note that by critical and criticism, I do not mean an attack. I mean an evaluative suggestion of improvement or observation from another (usually well-meaning) individual.

When I hear criticism, I hold it temporarily; assess if it is something I need to take on board or not. If this process of reflection brings light to a change I could make which would be beneficial, I endeavour to do so and take steps to do so. If my thoughtful consideration doesn’t deem the change valuable, I catalogue it or dismiss it.

There is so much good that can come from giving thoughtful feedback, asking for thoughtful feedback and receiving thoughtful feedback.

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