There are so many words that I could use to describe my journey and the different aspects of motherhood: elation, joy, completeness, love, fulfilling, frustrating, tiring, demanding, life-giving, life sapping. But looking back on my journey so far, a phrase I would use to encapsulate all of these words is “a courageous mission”.
I believe that motherhood is my mission and I believe that there is a whole lot of courage needed every single day of this motherhood journey.
I looked up the word ‘mission’ in the thesaurus, and three words stood out to me: lifework, purpose and quest. It is my life’s work to raise these children, it is my purpose to do all that I can to bring love into my children’s lives and it is my quest to raise warriors for Jesus.
It has taken me a while to learn this, but however I look at it, motherhood is my mission. I am a stay-at-home-mum to 3 little ones between 7 and 2, with another on the way. Everything I do is centred around my family. Everywhere I go, there’s a little person or three following me, so motherhood is my whole life.
I’ve seriously struggled with what my purpose is over the years. I really didn’t think that ‘just’ being a mum was enough. There were so many feelings of self-doubt, failure and misery rising up way too often and all I could do was get on my knees and cry out to God to give me some kind of answer as to why I was feeling this way. The answer was of course, simple. You are enough. You’re doing what I called you to do. You are exactly where you should be.
Of course, I haven’t figured it all out and I still have feelings of complete inadequacy. Some days all I can say to God is “When were you ever a stay at home parent with 3 kids who don’t listen?” “When did you ever have to clean wee off the toilet floor every day for two weeks?” “How would you know what it’s like to never be listened to?” Ha. Of course, later when I was a little calmer, the answer came: I know exactly what you’re going through. I do it every day. That brought me very quickly back down to earth and I realized…HE IS WITH ME EVERY STEP OF THE WAY. If I let Him guide me, I have everything I need in this mission. But I need the courage to actually admit that I need Him.
After seven-and-a-half years of mothering I absolutely believe I need courage every single day. Courage to be the best mother I can be. Choosing to get up every morning and give my kids what they deserve and need: time, love, support, a shoulder, an ear. Courage to not allow my feelings of inadequateness cloud what I need to do for my children.
It takes courage to step out and be an encouragement to other mothers. To not just live in my little cocoon, because sometimes with three kids and another on the way, it’s too hard and too overwhelming to leave the house.
It takes courage to tell my story. After all these years of motherhood, I have stories to share: for the purpose of building up, for the purpose of letting go, for the purpose of moving into the next season.
So, with all of this in mind, knowing and believing that being a mother is my mission, and giving myself permission to ask for courage every morning, I press on. Very soon, I will have my third daughter, and I want all of my daughters to know that being a mother is the most wonderful gift. There is so much enjoyment in the journey of raising little people to become the most outstanding adults.
I am their only example, and they should see from me that motherhood is actually wonderful.
Tina is a stay-at-home mum of four who recently moved from the city to a coastal country town in search of the simple life. She loves diy-ing, crafting, baking, fresh country air, warm sunlit rooms and sunrises. She loves to write about the joy and craziness of motherhood on her blog Love Chaos Love and is passionate about mums finding a tribe of like-minded mums where there is only love, acceptance and listening ears. She is a self-confessed procrastinator, introvert and lover of decluttering, and has recently found that having no TV is wonderful!